Why Don't You Have Friends at Work?

Nancy Anderson
Posted by in Career Advice


Strong friendships make you feel motivated and supported at work, and stressful deadlines are more manageable with compassionate team members on your side. If you're battling a shortage of work relationships, ask yourself whether you make an effort to connect with others or shrink away from social interactions. Evaluating your behavior toward colleagues can help you overcome loneliness and build uplifting work relationships.

1. Newbie Syndrome

Newness is often scary, as you don't yet know whom you can trust, and you may be reluctant to show signs of incompetence by asking for help. Fortunately, everyone is new at some point, so your co-workers expect a degree of aloofness while you adapt to the environment. However, don't allow your nervousness to stop you from joining into recreational activities or casual conversations. These laid-back, unscripted moments lay the foundations for lasting work relationships.

2. Unreliable Behavior

Whether you're a new or established hire, repeatedly displaying deceptive or selfish behavior marks you as an untrustworthy person. If your offenses are unintentional, you may not realize that others perceive you as a hindrance to the team. Try your best to overcome the past by privately discussing the matter with individual colleagues and asking how you can improve the problem. Be attentive to others' concerns, and thank your colleagues for being honest with you even if you don't agree with their criticism.

3. Poor Cultural Fit

Paying attention to company culture during job searches is increasingly important, as you may find yourself surrounded by co-workers and clients who don't share your professional values. In such situations, building meaningful work relationships is difficult because you are more likely to be guarded and reserved. If finding another position isn't an option, approach co-workers one on one to try and bond over common interests.

4. Antisocial Reputation

Maybe you turned down social invitations early on or you frequently avoid company events. Regardless of the scenario, co-workers may surpass their threshold of friendliness and stop making an effort to include you. Think about your behavioral patterns and whether or not you pursue isolation. If you are extremely introverted or prefer a separation between personal and work relationships, you may have to work harder to show your attractive qualities to others. Overcome your negative reputation by offering to help out with overdue or tedious projects, and take the initiative to invite others out for lunch.

5. Clique Central

In a workplace overrun with cliques, you can't help being the odd one out. People who are completely absorbed by their own group often value the safety net and sense of belonging that it offers while failing to realize how uninviting they appear to others. Avoid the tendency to force yourself on others, and focus on keeping your interactions friendly, natural and open-minded. Most likely, you have other friends or relatives who can help you stay positive and active while you wait for icy work relationships to thaw out.

Navigating an unfamiliar company culture is intimidating, so remind yourself that all friendships begin with your willingness to open up to strangers. You can't control how your co-workers behave, but you can project a friendly personality that makes you more approachable. Let co-workers see that you are kind, honest and passionate about your job, and your work relationships are sure to flourish.


Photo courtesy of stockimages at FreeDigitalPhotos.net

 

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